and so

take pictures. remember what it feels like to hold hands. a wink from across the room, from the right person, can make your heart smile. push yourself to do things you never normally do. You grow. walk around. this week I had a pot of tea and read the local loop paper/childrens books with a friend...never in my life has that felt so good. Learn the difference between farmed salmon and wild salmon. the silent are the most beautiful. the ones who dance with hula skirts get showered with light. have a glass of wine during the day, it's nice. this moment, right now, is in my top best days. not to be confused with top 8, people. But those top 8's are pretty significant...and make my days pretty awesome. having a man make you salmon on the grill with asparagus, rice pilaf and wine can be pretty special. Watch an artist do his work...you begin to see what they see. If we could only all see what they see...life would be so much gentler. Fox=Bush, Bush=Fox...what does that mean exactly? But hey, if the president of Mexico can say we need to secure our borders...CASE CLOSED. and when Charlie Gibson says...so she can't kiss? remember, he didn't ask it in a question format. lol.I sat at the most beautiful restaurant this week, over looking the most beautiful garden with rustic wooden windows...you must enjoy the simple beautiful things. My father has found over 6 cobble stones in the shapes of hearts...he brings them home to my mother when he finds them. They lay on her bathroom sink. One time, he went out of town on business without her and found a stone in the shape of a heart with a crack right down the center...he told her, this is what my heart did when you weren't with me. They have been together for 36 years. Find someone who can appreciate the smallest of things...and one who can find them. He makes my heart calm. sitting next to someone and laughing is wonderful, sitting next to someone and being silent is too. the smell of wet wood is one of my favorite smells when in the fireplace...along with the laundry and the smell of the basement in Chicago. He reminds me of where I come from and what makes me smile. "comfortable" meant one thing to me 5 years ago. "comfortable" means another to me now. sitting in the middle on the plane in between two older women ~ isn't easy. Laying in my own bed, with the lamp on by my side, the fan above me, the candle lit, and the t.v on...is one of my favorite things. I saw Ahkeela and the Bee this week...everyone should see it...because of the over all story, fishborne was pushing it again.I remember in college I would push characters because I felt I wasn't doing the part justice...Pap the director stopped me and said Ashley, you have to know, that you are strong yourself...you just need to say the words and the audience will get the point...don't push it.I only wish Fishborne could've heard that note. I told a long lost friend to hear the song on myspace as a way to find closure. we are lead to those, who help us most to grow, if we let them and we help them in return. Well I dont know if I believe that's true, but I know I am who I am today because of her. and whatever way our stories end...I ask forgiveness...and I have let her go we must work to make things right. My grandfather turns 93 on saturday, some of you know he hasn't been doing well lately. that man, taught me what a sense of humor is and how to put curlers in my hair. I miss him everyday and he's still here.
one word for you: sunrise.
~a